This past week, I spent my time ducking and dodging my story.
Seriously!
I would open a tab on my web browser, go to ClickUp, which is the platform that I use to write my story, and look at my list of stories.
I would spend 10 seconds looking at the title of the story that I wish to publish. Then, I would read the book description that I wrote. Which in my opinion, sounds very interesting. Then, I would nod, scroll down to my fanfiction stories, and start writing those.
Why?
For two reasons: Instant Gratification and Fear.
Instant Gratification of a Writer
One thing that I like about writing on FanFiction.net is the instant gratification that I receive from my followers.
With each chapter that I write, I am able to get live updates on how many people read that chapter, see who left a review, and even receive messages from my readers.
It is a wonderful feeling to see them!
Because I receive this temporary fulfillment and it gives me the push to write more.
And even though, my readers don’t leave a lot of reviews, the fact that they show up every week makes me :).
However, it is the same instant gratification that prevents me from writing my first novel.
“What happens if no one likes my book?”
“What happens if it is horrible?”
Those questions and many others are the thoughts that swirl though my head. Which lead me to…
Fear of a New Writer
While I like writing and reading my own stories, I want other people to like my stories as well. I really want them to like my book. And I think I would be heartbroken if they didn’t.
Maybe this fear comes from my past when I was a people pleaser.
Or, maybe it stems from the fact that I think that I am not able to write a good book.
Who knows?
What I do know I let fear and instant gratification get in the way of me writing my first novel.
And to be honest, statistically speaking, if I like the story that I’m writing, then there should be at least ten other people in the world who would like my novel.
Goals
So, my goal for the week is to write 5,000 words for my novel. I will let you know how it goes.
